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Hey, new twine user who would love feedback on my game :)

This is the first one I've made so far:

http://philome.la/returnshift/vampire-dating-sim/play

I'd love to hear what you all think.

Comments

  • This was absolutely hilarious. I died on pretty much every move. Loved it! Writing style was perfect with the cheesy pictures.
  • Thank you so much @stray!
  • Haha! That was great! Funny and fun. :) Pictures were awesome.

    One bit of constructive feedback: Maybe put your choices on separate lines, or otherwise separate the sentences in some way. It was a little hard to recognize that there were two options until I hovered on them. Hope that helps! Keep up the good work! :)
  • Great first effort: that was entertaining :) . I also love the pictures, and the tone of the writing.

    My suggestion would be to maybe make the pictures a consistent size, and perhaps do a bit of css styling to convey the mood a bit more through the typography... maybe a bloody font and red color for links, or some such.
  • This is great feedback! @kalico, I will definitely keep placing the choices on separate lines in mind:) @JordanMagnuson, really cool idea!
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